never seen such a beautiful girl

(Hi Blog! Did you miss me? The feeling's not mutual if you did miss me. I've got a new found lover. Tumblr has been keeping me busy all this time.)

Since this is a personal blog, let's get personal!

I'm in a bit of a rut. Figuratively. But the good news is I'm not at all depressed. I'm quite happy, for real this time. I feel like I've really come to terms with myself. You know how other people say you should embrace both the good and bad side of you? Well hello!? For the past few months, that's exactly what I did. I opened my arms to the ugliest parts of me, the disappointing parts of my personality. And here I am. Let's just say I've found a new philosophy in the words of Richard Carlson, "I'm not okay, you're not okay, but that's okay!"

The biggest lesson I've learned in the past few months is Failure. Yes, with a capital F. I'm done beating myself up with this particular F word. I won't go into the boring details. You know it, I know it. However, it's not the end point. I can still do something about it. So for now, that's what I'm focusing on. It may sound like I've reached this new-found wisdom with ease noh? Haha I've poured my blood and tears for me to be  at peace with some of the things that didn't work out the way I planned them to. I read quite a bit of self-help books (lalala), listened to inspirational stuff on TED.com, and spent endless amount of time talking to my friends about it and spending time with myself to fully absorb, accept, and move past it. I'm not done yet. There's still a long way to go. But there you have it. Sometimes things just don't work out as planned. Actually, most of the time. So I always keep in mind that we all just have to roll with the punches.

Let's talk about love. I have a certain (phantom) interest in a guy who's unattainable, so to speak. Awww it makes me giddy just thinking about him. However, I have decided long ago that I won't do anything about it. The interesting thing is that it made me realize how I am towards the opposite sex. Because of my stupid crush, I realized I am such a bad flirt. Ooops, not even close to being a flirt. And then I find it funny how people (or maybe it's just me) usually overthink things when they are in a situation like this. I like to humor myself by calling me a fifth grader. I lose my cool, and I hate when that happens. I am usually a confident person. When I say confident, what I mean is that I don't get embarrassed easily. It takes about a year or two for me to get embarrassed about something. LOL. Kidding aside, I find it funny how when you start to like someone, you want to be this really cool person who is easy, breezy, funny, perky... (parang nipple nato ah) But then that's where I fail miserably. I'm just ranting. I just write what I think at this very moment. But I'm kind of enjoying this process. Nothing serious. Maybe it's the fact that it's been awhile since I was not part of a couple. So singlehood is quite a revelation to me (again).

I don't want to write about my plans anymore. According to research, if you broadcast your long-term goals, there's a high possibility it won't push through. Case in point, it already happened to me several times. So no more drawing boards for this blog. Haha. So there you go. I'm keeping things simple now, blog. I'm working, saving, living.

By the way, I'm not sure what I'd do with Project 24 for the next couple of months. We still have almost 8 months ahead of us. I thought this is not going to be a diary type, but as I've said some things just happen organically. That's fine. All I know is this should be a blog on what heppens at age 24.

There you go! I'll be back soon.