taking it slow

"it is late, and when a man has little time, he must take care to maintain his calm. we must act as if we had enternity before us." -william of baskerville

i don't want to admit that i can't do this. i will do this and i will finish this damn thesis.

the more i read all this stuff about umberto eco's works and criticism, the more it becomes clear to me that i am meant to do something else with my life than this. i thought i loved the academe, maybe i do but not to the extent of applying for graduate school etc. i keep beating myself for not finishing on time, for not being a good student, for slacking off... all through out my school life, i was a conscientious student. perhaps not the most hardworking one, but definitely i didn't see myself as one of the last ones among my peers to finish my degree. i do regret not making the most out of my opportunities in the university. but i'm not losing hope. i just have to keep my calm, work and work some more.